Howdy folks, I’m DigitallyProbedLeif. And I’ve got my nose stuck so far up The Nancy Twins butts, that you can see my nostrils if they say “ahhh.”
Just kidding, and I digress.
I’m here to teach you the DigitallyProbedLeif method of leadership and advertising.
- Never take “No” or “Don’t email me anymore please”, for an answer.
- Be sure to email again and again, even after blocked on social media sites, and if they block you, report them to their ISP for “email abuse.”
- Be sure if questioned about your Leader package at EmpireKred that you try to deny you are a leader there.
- When running false advertising, be sure to promote yourself as a “social sales rock star.”
- Make sure when talking to someone that knows far more than you about the subject matter to insist you yourself are the “objective one” and they are clearly “subjective.”
- Be sure to not deliver on your promises over the course of a month or so.
- Once questioned why you haven’t delivered, only give that product or endorsement to the 3 highest ranked people on your list or deliveries to be made.
- Be sure to call people, “Al Gore Hunting Manbearpig” when wrong because you just can’t accept objective and very direct criticism.
- Make sure to complain to higher authority that your false advertising is being openly discussed, even as it’s being run on a sit that claims to prohibit such content.
- Spam celebrities with weird pictures of yourself and argue with them after they object to your tweeting them.
- Make a general ass of yourself by attacking celebrities on Twitter.
- Try to switch context so it seems as if you’re the victim for having your false advertising pointed out.
- Never let them see you sweat, and most of all, never admit that you continued to run false advertising even after Klout confirmed you were wrong.
- Have some crazy lady who is hiding from investigators try to protect you from social media news by trying to obtain a restraining order.
- When that fails, continue to cry about having your false advertising discussed in the context of an organization with a 4 year history of attacking their own customers, having a “goon squad” and that you’re a leader in.
In this way you can prove your goon squad bonafides! And be a world leader in the bottom run of the social media marketing and advertising ad space!
Happy Halloween From DigitallyProbedKeith!
Next week, The FTC, False Advertising and You!
Here’s a hint:
- Have a “backdoor” in programming so those pesky FTC regulations can be bypassed!